Good Grief

Long post alert, sorry!

So...the survival mode we were in following the first 72 hours after the initial news about Gordon has slowly given way to the acceptance that life has to go on, which is obviously not to say that it's been painless. Gordon's absence is a staggering one, felt by everyone from my dad who's not really a dog person, to neighbors we barely know.

For now, it's good to have each other. As hard as it is to see how sad Louie is, I don't know what we'd do without him, and we're squeezing him extra tight and letting him kiss us like there's no tomorrow...he's eager to do it, so it works well for everyone.

This has probably hit him the hardest, and I suspect that he has developed some separation anxiety issues as a result. I don't blame him one bit: one day, his best friend disappears with no explanation...what's to stop the same thing from happening to one of us? He was absolutely ecstatic when I returned home to him Thursday night after just a few hours, but not in his usual, happy way. It was more like he was saying "I-was-so-afraid-you-were-never-coming-back!" We've been arranging our schedules so that he is left alone as little as possible and to allow him as much playtime with familiar friends.

As for us, I have to say that the way everyone has been there for us this past week has really reopened my eyes to how awesome our friends and families are, even though some are far away. We even received beautiful flowers from Stacey & Chris in NYC:

and from Sar & Jon out in CA:

How can you help but smile when you walk past these cheery colors? Gordon would have loved to chew them up!


The weekend was packed, and it's the first time in awhile that I've been glad for that. Here's a rundown of how we've been staying busy:

I finally decided to take the plunge and get my hair hacked. I decided that there was no better time to make a fresh change, and that maybe it would make me feel better. I was all set to walk out of there looking like Katie Holmes, but a wise friend cautioned that in my fragile emotional state, going too extreme might be a mistake. So true. My 'do is far more boring, but I still had 4.5 inches cut off!!

Here's me before (about a month ago):

Here's me now (apologies for the weird staring off into space look):I like it, even though when I walked out of the salon in my head-to-toe J.Crew ensemble, complete with sweater vest, I felt like I'd officially assumed the role of suburban wife. My mother in law promises that's not how I look, and I can usually count on her to shoot straight. In any case, the cut itself is pretty versatile, giving me plenty of ways to funk it up a little when I want to.

On Friday evening, after dropping Louie off at Matt's parents' (for play therapy with his doggie cousins), we first met friends for cocktails at D's Place in Soulard. The highlight for me was the pair of fluffy little dogs of one of the patrons who walked around like they owned the place. I made my embarrassed husband snap pictures of me talking to and babying them:

Then we met my parents for dinner in celebration of my Dad's birthday at Revival, which opened last fall in the space that used to house King Louie's (one of our favorites).

My food was just ok (I chose the stewed-rabbit ravioli with spinach and sheep's milk cheese - I know, I was asking for it by ordering rabbit two days before Easter), but I devoured it nonetheless. I must say that grief is excellent on the figure. Once I had really taken time to consider it, the only "food" I had consumed since Tuesday afternoon was half of a vanilla shake (and you KNOW there's a problem when I can't take down a shake), and a wheat bagel with cream cheese. Not once during that entire time did I experience even the slightest pang of hunger. I'm joking of course about using bereavement as a dieting tool, and was actually really glad that my appetite returned with a vengeance on Friday. That was the first step back to normal.

Back to our experience at Revival, everyone else really loved their meals (my mom had the grilled trout, my dad went for the seared scallops with parsnips, and Matt enjoyed his beef tenderloin). Personally, I don't think I'd go back for awhile. It appeared to me that they were still working out the kinks as far as service went...or maybe it was just our waiter, even though as a dead ringer for Ryan Gosling, he wasn't hard on the eyes. I was most disappointed with the fact that the reason we decided to try Revival in the first place was that Erin Bode was scheduled to perform and never did! Not only that, there was no live music at all. Luckily the conversation was just as good, my dad enjoyed himself, and it was an escape from the trauma of our past week.

We spent Saturday trying to keep ourselves and Louie occupied. Matt finally took Gordon's crate to store in the basement, and poor Louie followed him and then sat in it. That night, our best friends showed up with drinks and dinner to take our minds off of life and keep us company while we watched basketball. Thank god for them! I was dreading that night, since weekends had recently become lots of fun with the dogs. Gordon seemed to have kicked his bed-wetting habit once and for all, so we would all sleep together the whole night (as opposed to crating him and then bringing him to our bed after he went out to potty around 5:30 or so). He was just starting to sleep through the night, and was quite the snuggler. Last Saturday, I woke up to Matt laughing because Gordon had affixed himself to my face and was snoring comfortably there :)

We made it through that by watching Knocked Up for the 20th time, and then spent a busy Easter yesterday with my parents and aunt for brunch, Matt's extended family for a late lunch, and then finished off the day at my in-laws' with just the immediate family (plus dogs, of course) for dinner.

We played Apples to Apples, which I thought was a kids' game but turns out gets pretty hilarious after sucking down a few Captain + Diet Dr. Peppers :)

Matt's mom informed us that at the suggestion of Bobby Flay, she had hard-cooked the eggs this year instead of hard boiling them. To hard cook, you bring the water to a simmer, add the eggs and immediately turn off the heat, and allow them to cook for 15 minutes. In case you were wondering, the verdict was that the yolks were more moist, but the eggs themselves were possibly harder to peel. We took turns showing off our egg-peeling skills: Louie's cousins Ernie...
...and Violet

All in all, Louie was kept as distracted as possible from missing his buddy all weekend, and we had a lot of people taking it upon themselves to make sure that we were, too.

I really only have one complaint: SNOW on Easter? Really?